Romeo and Juliet is one of Shakespeare’s most famous tragedies, known for its compelling yet heartbreaking love story. The play follows two young star-crossed lovers whose families are bitter enemies. Despite the feud between their families, Romeo and Juliet fall desperately in love at first sight. Their burning passion drives them to marry in secret. However, their covert romance meets a tragic end when both commit suicide believing the other is dead.
Romeo and Juliet’s intense devotion to each other, even unto death, has led many readers to view theirs as an ideal romantic relationship. Their willingness to defy their families and risk everything for love seems to portray an awe-inspiring, unquenchable love. Yet while Romeo and Juliet’s relationship burns fervently, a closer examination reveals their love may be more lust and infatuation than a deep, lasting bond.
Romeo’s Shallow Passions
Prior to meeting Juliet, Romeo pines after another woman named Rosaline. He insists his love for Rosaline consumes him entirely, claiming, “She hath forsworn to love, and in that vow/Do I live dead that live to tell it now.” He is melodramatic about this unrequited love, moping around and writing sad poetry about it.
Yet the minute he lays eyes on Juliet at a party, he forgets Rosaline completely, transferring his affections to Juliet immediately. Such a quick shift in devotion shows his passions are fleeting and shallow. Juliet even calls his inconsistency, asking, “Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight!/For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night.” His ardour is fickle, bound to whatever woman catches his current fancy.
Juliet’s Immaturity
While Romeo is inconstant, Juliet shows immaturity in her affections. When they barely know one another, she agrees to marry Romeo, planning to meet and wed him within a day of their first meeting. She puts herself entirely under Romeo’s influence, stating, “My bounty is as boundless as the sea,/My love as deep.” Such reckless abandon and willingness to rushed devotion indicates she is still quite young.
In fact, Juliet is likely only 13 years old. During Elizabethan times, women married very young, but Juliet is still not old enough to be married without parental consent. Her age explains the rashness of her decision to wed so quickly. She acts on a girlish crush, one unlikely to mature into a deep, lasting commitment.
Hasty Marriage
Romeo and Juliet marry less than 24 hours after first meeting at her family’s party. Not only is their marriage illegal without parental approval, but this rushed wedding suggests infatuation rather than true love. Mature, deep relationships need time to grow and develop. By jumping so hastily into marriage, their love has no chance to blossom at a healthy pace.
Additionally, the surreptitious nature of their union hints at underlying flaws. They cannot declare their marriage openly, forced to hide it even from their closest confidants like the Nurse and Friar Lawrence. True love generally seeks the blessing of loved ones. The secretive nature of their bond suggests they subconsciously understand it unwise.
Prioritizing Passion Over Practicality
In their affair, Romeo and Juliet privilege passion over prudence at every turn. They ignore the danger and social realities around them, meeting in secret and refusing to acknowledge legitimate risks. Their determination to be together overwhelms rational concerns for their safety.
When Romeo is banished for killing Tybalt, Juliet goes to extreme lengths to be with him, faking her own death. In response, Romeo immediately commits suicide upon seeing her supposedly dead body, not even pausing to investigate if she might truly still be alive. While some view this as romantic, it is in fact irrational and immature. Their love inspires reckless behavior, not reasoned decisions.
Conflict With Family
Another concerning aspect is Romeo and Juliet’s willingness to completely turn against their families. They demonstrate no desire for reconciliation between the feuding houses. Even their shared surname, Montague and Capulet, they vow means nothing compared to their love. Juliet states she is “no longer a Capulet” after marrying Romeo.
In functional relationships, partners retain their individual identities. Juliet should not have to renounce her name and family to be with Romeo. Their isolation and secret tryst cut them off from the wisdom and counsel of elders. True love can withstand obstacles without forcing such divisions.
Impulsiveness and Violence
Romeo exhibits violent tendencies that are troubling. When he learns Juliet is dead, he immediately purchases poison. Without verifying her death, he rushes to commit suicide. Earlier as well, upon discovering Juliet’s cousin Tybalt killed his friend Mercutio, Romeo allows rage to overcome him, killing Tybalt in a duel.
While Tybalt did murder Romeo’s friend, such impulsiveness leading to violence reveals that Romeo lacks self-control. Passion again overrides reason in his actions. Mature love leads one towards patience and understanding, not knee-jerk responses. His reactions provide insight into his immaturity.
No Development
The intense infatuation Romeo and Juliet first exhibit never has a chance to deepen into substantial, lasting commitment. From that initial glance across a crowded party, every subsequent interaction between them burns with the same urgent fervor. The “love” displayed between them at the start of the play is essentially identical to their feelings at the end.
Because their relationship is cut tragically short, it is frozen in time. The audience never witnesses Romeo and Juliet navigating conflict or growing together through life experiences. We cannot know if their love would have remained the same with age and maturity. Their whirlwind romance lacks time to flourish into something solid, tested and enduring.
Different Values
While Romeo and Juliet share an undeniable magnetism, their values and mindsets differ in substantial ways. Juliet, though bold in agreeing to secretly marry Romeo, generally behaves as an obedient daughter. Her parents’ wishes are still important to her, driving her continued efforts at conciliation.
In contrast, Romeo rarely mentions his parents after falling for Juliet. He pursues her single-mindedly, ignoring the ramifications. Juliet is religious, invoking God frequently. Romeo tends to be ruled more by emotions than any devotion to faith. Fundamentally, they do not hold the same principles guiding them through life, despite their powerful physical attraction.
Conclusion
Romeo and Juliet displays a storied romance that has become iconic. However, while their love holds passion, closer inspection reveals a relationship built on lust and impulse, not a solid foundation prizing communication, maturity, and temperance.
Their youth, haste, secrecy, and recklessness all indicate a love based on infatuation and attraction rather than true understanding. Placing each other above all else may seem romantic, but ultimately proves tragically dangerous. Their relationship serves as a cautionary tale about the power of unchecked passions. While fervent, it falls short of a healthy, lasting love.
| Signs of Immature Love | Signs of Mature Love |
|---|---|
| Fickleness | Loyalty |
| Hiding relationship | Openness |
| Prioritizing passion over practicality | Balancing passion and reason |
| Rash decisions | Thoughtful choices |
| Infatuation | Intimacy |
| Secrecy | Communication |
| Isolation from others | Integration with community |
| Haste | Patience |
| Volatility | Stability |
| Superficial attraction | Mature understanding |
