Should you keep texting a dry Texter?

Dealing with a dry texter can be frustrating. You’re trying to have a conversation over text but they respond with one-word answers or vague responses. So what should you do if you find yourself texting someone who seems disinterested? Here’s a quick look at whether you should keep texting a dry texter.

What is a dry texter?

A dry texter refers to someone who responds to texts with minimal effort. Their responses are typically short, vague, or one-worded. For example, if you text them asking how their day is going, they may simply respond with “fine” or “good” without reciprocating the question.

Some common signs that you’re dealing with a dry texter include:

  • They frequently respond with one-word answers like “yeah”, “nice”, or “ok”
  • You have to carry the conversation and ask all the questions
  • Their responses don’t continue or further the conversation
  • There are long delays between responses and little reciprocation
  • They ignore or don’t respond to certain messages

Essentially, a dry texter shows little interest or effort in having a conversation over text. The conversation feels one-sided and leaves you constantly trying to get more than a short or vague response.

Why do people dry text?

There are a few common reasons why someone may resort to dry texting:

  • They’re busy. Oftentimes dry texters simply have other priorities and can’t fully engage in conversations. They may be at work, driving, or preoccupied with something else and can only offer short responses.
  • They prefer in-person conversations. Some people just don’t like texting for meaningful conversations. They find it easier and more engaging to talk face-to-face, so they keep text exchanges short.
  • They’re not interested. Let’s face it – some dry texters simply aren’t interested in the conversation or don’t feel a connection. Short responses may signal low investment.
  • You’re not discussing the right topics. Dry texters may seem more engaged if you switch gears and bring up topics they’re passionate about.
  • It’s their communication style. For some, short responses are their norm. They may not even realize they come across as dry texters.
  • They prefer phone calls. Phone conversations may be easier for dry texters rather than typing long messages.

Figuring out the reason behind the dry texting can help determine the best approach. If they’re genuinely busy, give them space. If they prefer calls, switch mediums. Identifying the cause will let you decide if it’s worth continuing the text exchanges.

The pros of continuing to text a dry texter

Despite the frustrations, there may be some valid reasons to keep texting a dry texter:

  • Give them a chance to warm up. For some dry texters, it may take time texting back and forth before they get comfortable. Continuing the conversation shows you’re making an effort.
  • See if engagement increases. Keeping the text door open allows you to evaluate whether responses eventually improve. Persistence may pay off.
  • Let the relationship develop slowly. Pressuring dry texters for immediate enthusiasm may backfire. Have patience and let things progress organically.
  • Focus on in-person time together. For people who prefer face-to-face chats, texting may not be the best medium. Nurture the relationship through quality offline time.
  • Give them space when busy. If dry texting happens during busy times, staying in touch lightly keeps you on their radar for when life slows down.
  • It may be their norm. Accepting terse responses may be something you must adapt to if dry texting is their typical style.

Continuing to text with a dry texter demonstrates interest, gives them a chance to get comfortable with you, and keeps the lines of communication open in case engagement eventually improves.

The cons of continuing to text a dry texter

On the other hand, there are also some drawbacks to consider if you keep texting someone who gives minimal responses:

  • It feels one-sided. Having to constantly initiate and carry the conversation creates an imbalanced dynamic in the relationship.
  • It may signal disinterest. Their lack of reciprocation or effort to sustain conversations may reflect ambivalence about you.
  • It can be frustrating. Trying to connect with short and vague responses leaves you unsatisfied. This breeds resentment.
  • You may be forcing it. Having to draw responses out of someone repeatedly feels inauthentic. Chemistry suffers.
  • It sets a precedent. Accepting their bad texting habits early on establishes this detached dynamic going forward.
  • It stunts getting to know them. Surface-level conversations make it harder to build intimacy, trust, and really understand someone.

At a certain point, you may have to step back and evaluate whether your time is best spent texting someone who doesn’t meet your communication needs – even if they improve eventually.

Signs it’s time to stop texting a dry texter

No two situations are alike. While it can be worthwhile giving dry texters a chance, there’s also a limit. Watch for these signs that it may be time to stop texting:

  • You feel anxiety or dread when you see a notification from them
  • The conversation constantly fizzles out within a few exchanges
  • Their responses never progress beyond one or two words
  • They frequently take hours or days to respond, if at all
  • Trying to talk to them is emotionally exhausting
  • You’re always initiating contact without reciprocation
  • You repeatedly apologize or make excuses for their lack of effort
  • The relationship doesn’t progress beyond superficial texting
  • Your texts frequently go ignored
  • When talking in real life, they seem distracted or unengaged

At the end of the day, how you feel when texting someone matters most. If dry responses leave you perpetually frustrated or hurt, it may be healthiest to refocus your energy elsewhere.

How to stop texting a dry texter

If you decide to stop pursuing a one-sided text conversation, here are some tips for ending contact gracefully:

  • Slowly respond less frequently or let their texts sit unanswered
  • Claim you’re busy if they ask why responses have dropped off
  • Politely decline or make excuses if they propose getting together
  • Stop initiating contact yourself and see if they text first (they likely won’t)
  • If asked, explain you didn’t feel you were compatible communicators
  • Unfollow or mute them on social media to create distance
  • End the text relationship definitively rather than ghosting
  • Adopt a simple, positive tone even when ending contact
  • Be prepared to explain your reasons if pressed
  • Refuse to re-engage if they make a half-hearted effort after the fact

The key is to pull away gradually and consistently so they get the hint, rather than expecting them to have an epiphany. A clean break allows you to refocus energy on people who better meet your needs.

How to identify dry texters early on

Learning to spot the signs of a dry texter quickly can prevent wasted time and frustration down the road:

  • Note if their initial response to your first texts is brief
  • Pay attention if you’re always the one to text first
  • See if you have to pry responses out of them with follow up texts
  • Notice if they never ask you questions about yourself
  • Watch for delayed response times right from the beginning
  • Evaluate whether they try to continue or deepen the conversation
  • Check if their responses relate back to what you’ve said
  • Watch for texts ending the conversation abruptly
  • Consider if you feel you’re interviewing them when you text
  • Pay attention to whether your texts make you feel anxious or rejected

Trust your instincts – even early on, you’ll get a sense of their engagement level through texting. Identifying dry texter tendencies from the start allows you to opt out before wasting your time.

Tips for texting dry texters

If you choose to keep texting a dry responder, here are some tips to make the best of it:

  • Use open-ended questions to give them something meaty to respond to
  • Bring up shared interests you might connect over
  • Limit small talk and keep the conversation focused
  • Ask for their opinion on deeper topics to draw them out
  • Set a time limit on how long you’ll wait for responses before moving on
  • Take breaks from texting if it becomes tedious or upsetting
  • Focus your energy elsewhere so dry texting doesn’t consume your time
  • Suggest talking on the phone instead; they may prefer verbal chats
  • Propose catching up in person when possible to change mediums
  • Avoid scolding or shaming them as this will only push them further away

With the right questions and conversational tactics, you may be able to get faint glimmers of responsiveness from even the driest texter. But know when to walk away if you’re putting in all the effort.

Conclusion

Dealing with a dry texter can certainly be frustrating. But in some cases, continuing to text them here and there may lead to improved engagement over time. However, if their minimal responses leave you perpetually unsatisfied or hurt, don’t hesitate to move on. Pay attention to how the text conversations make you feel. If you’re always left anxious, angry or exhausted, your time is likely better spent with others who reciprocate interest. With the right boundaries, you can optimize text exchanges to nurture relationships – even with those who don’t text with enthusiasm.

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