How do you ignore someone you love and see everyday?

Quick Answers

Ignoring someone you love and see every day can be very challenging. Here are some quick tips:

  • Avoid eye contact and looking directly at them
  • Limit conversations to only what’s necessary
  • Find ways to distract yourself when you are around them
  • Surround yourself with other people so you aren’t alone together
  • Keep interactions brief, polite and formal

Why is it Hard to Ignore Someone You Love?

It’s incredibly difficult to ignore someone you have feelings for because love fosters deep connection. When you love someone, you naturally want to interact with them, get close to them, and give and receive affection. Trying to go against those instincts can feel unnatural and challenging. Here are some of the main reasons it’s so hard to ignore someone you love:

  • Strong emotional attachment – Love bonds you tightly to that person emotionally. Your feelings don’t just disappear when you want to ignore them.
  • Physical and sexual attraction – When you love someone, you feel drawn to them physically as well. That chemistry and desire is still there even when you try to ignore it.
  • Habit and routine – If you are used to constant interaction with someone you love, it can be extremely difficult to suddenly break that habit.
  • Caring about them – When you love someone, you inherently care about and are interested in their wellbeing. Ignoring them contradicts these feelings.
  • Desire for their attention – Being ignored by someone you love can be very painful. You likely crave their attention, affection and validation.

The depth of connection formed by love does not sever easily. Even if your logical mind wants to ignore this person, your heart continues pulling you towards them. Forcing yourself to ignore someone you still love goes against your natural instincts.

It Feels Like Rejection

Being ignored by someone you love also tends to feel like rejection. Love makes you vulnerable and open to that person. When they suddenly start ignoring you, it can feel like they are rejecting your feelings and pulling away from the relationship. This rejection is painful and confusing, making the ignoring even harder to accept and cope with.

You Miss Them

Additionally, when you love someone and share so much closeness, ignoring them means you now miss out on all of that. You miss the intimacy, bonding, affection, companionship, laughter, support and all the little things that made your relationship special. The loss of that rewarding interaction with your loved one can make the emptiness of ignoring them feel profound.

How to Cope With Ignoring Someone You Love

While extremely difficult, there are some ways to help cope with having to ignore someone you love and see regularly:

Distance Yourself Emotionally

Work on creating emotional distance from this person. Reduce obsessive thoughts about them, stop idealizing them, and remind yourself regularly of their flaws and the issues in your relationship. This can help diminish some of the intensity of your romantic feelings.

Fill Your Time with Other Activities

Fill your schedule up with work, hobbies, friends and other engagements so you simply don’t have as much time to think about them or be tempted to interact with them. Staying busy and distracted will make ignoring them easier.

Limit Contact Channels

Eliminate contacting them through methods like phone calls, texting, social media and any other avenues that are not strictly necessary. This reduces opportunities for unnecessary interaction.

Keep Interactions Brief and Surface Level

When you do have to interact, keep it brief, polite, formal and focused on surface topics. Don’t ask personal questions or share anything vulnerable. Limit the depth of these interactions.

Surround Yourself with Supportive People

Spend increased time with close friends, family members and other people who bolster your spirits and confidence. Their support can strengthen your resolve to maintain distance from this person. Leaning on your support system is crucial.

Remind Yourself Why Ignoring is Necessary

Make a list of all the reasons you need to ignore this person, such as unhealthy dynamics in the relationship, needing time and space to heal, or wanting to move on. Re-read this list whenever you feel your conviction crumbling.

Be Gentle with Yourself

Ignoring someone you love is extremely hard. Be compassionate with yourself, allow yourself to feel emotions fully, and reward yourself for small successes in maintaining distance. Don’t beat yourself up for slip-ups. Healing takes time.

Channel the Energy into Self-Care

Use the time and mental energy that you would have spent on this person and instead invest it in self-care practices. Do things that help you feel stronger and more grounded, like therapy, exercise, connecting with other friends, and engaging in hobbies.

Accept the Discomfort

Understand that ignoring someone you love will likely feel very uncomfortable for some time. Accept that discomfort, don’t fight it, and trust that it will subside eventually as you heal and create distance. Be patient with the process.

How Long Should You Ignore Someone You Love?

There is no set rule for how long to ignore someone you love. The duration depends on your unique situation and reasons for needing to cut contact. Here are some factors to consider:

  • The severity of issues leading to the ignoring – More serious problems often warrant more time apart.
  • How entangled your lives are – Greater enmeshment usually requires longer periods of no contact.
  • Whether one of you needs to move on fully – Ignoring someone indefinitely may be necessary if you need to get over them.
  • How much time has passed – As time passes, you regain perspective and emotional distance.
  • Whether issues have been resolved – Once underlying conflicts and hurts have improved, ignoring may no longer serve a purpose.

Pay attention to your inner state and emotional healing process. When you feel you have sufficient clarity and distance, you can consider whether the ignoring has served its needed purpose. If both people are on board to reconcile, productive communication can potentially resume. But if one still needs more time, ignore for as long as necessary.

Temporary Ignoring vs. Long-Term No Contact

In some cases, a temporary period of ignoring someone you love can be beneficial. For example, a few weeks of limited contact after a bad fight could help cool tensions.

But in situations like abuse, addiction issues, or when a relationship is ending, much longer term no contact is likely required – potentially permanently. Each situation is unique, so reflect carefully before deciding on what duration of ignoring is right for you.

How to Ignore Someone You Love Who Lives with You

Ignoring someone you love becomes exponentially harder if you live together, whether in a romantic relationship or as family members. Here are some strategies that can help:

  • Spend less time at home together – Find reasons to stay out of the house and limit time you are there together.
  • Avoid being alone together – Make sure others are around at home as a buffer to avoid 1-on-1 interactions.
  • Create space in the home – Spend alone time in separate rooms with the door closed.
  • Communicate only when essential – Discuss only household matters, in a polite but distant way.
  • Set clear boundaries – Clarify that you need space and do not want to socialize or connect beyond basic coexistence.
  • Get support – Lean on friends/family to stay elsewhere occasionally when you need a break.
  • Make a plan to move out – If feasible, make arrangements to move into your own place long-term.

Living together makes ignoring very difficult. If tensions are high, consider staying elsewhere temporarily until you can make arrangements for one person to move out.

How to Ignore Someone You Love at Work

If you work with someone you love but need to ignore, these tips can help:

  • Limit contact to only work matters – Interact only when absolutely necessary for work.
  • Keep communications brief and professional – No personal conversing or relationship talk.
  • Avoid being alone together – Stay in groups in shared spaces like break rooms.
  • Limit eye contact and physical proximity – Sit far apart in meetings, avoid standing near them.
  • Find other people to collaborate with – Volunteer for projects with colleagues you trust.
  • Use email rather than discussing in-person – Creates documentation trail.
  • Remain polite and civil – You still have to maintain a professional environment.
  • Transfer teams or departments if needed – Discuss with HR if the situation becomes untenable.

Ignoring a coworker you love can be very tricky to balance. Protect yourself and your career, while being careful not to let emotions create problems on the job.

How to Ignore Someone You Love Who Keeps Texting You

Getting frequent texts from someone you are trying to ignore can undermine your efforts to create distance. Here are some tips if you are getting unwanted texts from someone you love:

  • Ask them directly to stop texting you – Clearly state you need no-contact.
  • Be brief if you must respond – Answer only necessary logistics, don’t engage emotionally.
  • Block their number – This prevents you from even seeing their texts.
  • Use auto-responses – Apps can auto-reply a brief text like “Please no contact”.
  • Disable text notifications – So you aren’t alerted when they text.
  • Redirect texts to a friend – For accountability and perspective.
  • Send their texts to spam – So they don’t show up in your main inbox.
  • Document harassing texts – Save evidence in case you need to involve authorities.

Unwanted frequent texts can sabotage your efforts to ignore someone. Take proactive measures to block and limit their ability to contact you this way.

How to Ignore Someone You Love on Social Media

Social media can also make ignoring someone you love very difficult due to constant contact and information about their life. Here are some social media strategies:

  • Unfollow/mute their accounts – You stay connected but won’t see their posts.
  • Block them entirely – Most drastic option, they can no longer interact with you.
  • Delete/deactivate your accounts – Take a break from social media altogether.
  • Limit checking social media – Checking less helps avoid temptation to interact.
  • Ask friends not to mention them – Request that friends leave them out of your conversations.
  • Don’t post with ignoring motive – Making dramatic “moving on” type posts can backfire.
  • Make accounts private – So only accepted followers can see your content.

Social media has the unfortunate effect of making it much harder to ignore someone completely. Use settings judiciously to create boundaries without passive aggressive indirect contact.

How to Ignore Someone You Love Who Ignores You

It can feel especially frustrating and confusing when you are trying to get over someone who has already started ignoring you. Some tips:

  • Resist repeated contact attempts – Texting/calling excessively will likely backfire.
  • Ask a mutual friend to mediate – See if a friend can gently check on their state of mind for you.
  • Consider if space is what they need – The ignoring may be their way of establishing a boundary.
  • Write a letter – Express your thoughts and feelings in an unsent letter.
  • Accept lack of closure – You may need to make peace with not knowing the explicit reasons.
  • Refocus on your own life – Dive into self-care practices and lean on other loved ones for support.
  • Forgive yourself if needed – If you contributed to their ignoring in some way, work on self-forgiveness.

Being ignored by someone you love hurts deeply. But trying to demand answers or force them to talk to you will likely only drive them further away. Look for healthy ways to process the pain and regain your sense of empowerment.

When Should You Stop Ignoring Someone You Love?

It is possible for a period of ignoring to serve its purpose, and no longer be necessary. Consider ending the ignoring if:

  • Enough time has passed for thoughts and feelings to calm down.
  • Interpersonal issues that caused the strain have been worked through.
  • You’ve had time to gain perspective and clarity.
  • Productive communication and rebuilding trust seem feasible.
  • You are both willing to make effort to salvage the relationship.
  • The situation feels emotionally resolved enough to move forward.

Sometimes ignoring is only meant to be temporary. When you’ve both had time to heal and reflect, you may decide you are ready to carefully reconnect. This can allow you to interact from a healthier emotional place.

How to Start Communicating Again After Ignoring Someone You Love

If you determine the ignoring has served its purpose and you both want to interact again, proceed slowly and with caution:

  • Have an initial check-in talk to set expectations.
  • Discuss what has changed or shifted during the time apart.
  • Explain your personal growth and insights gained.
  • Apologize for any ways you contributed to the past problems.
  • Ask what they need from you moving forward.
  • Offer to start fresh and slowly rebuild from a place of mutual care and respect.
  • Suggest counseling if major issues need to be worked through.
  • Commit to regular transparency, openness and patience.

Reconnecting requires empathy, accountability and letting go of residual resentment. With maturity and care, ignoring can sometimes lay the groundwork for a relationship to heal. But both people must be willing to put in the effort.

Conclusion

Having to ignore someone you profoundly care for and love deeply is an incredibly challenging predicament to navigate. The longing to interact is constantly at battle with the need for distance. Patience, self-compassion and commitment to filling your time with things that nourish you are so important. Leaning on supportive friends and family can help lessen the loneliness. While the discomfort of ignoring someone you love may persist for some time, gradually the ache will diminish if you stay focused on your healing. With time, care and emotional work, you can regain your sense of inner peace. Stay strong through the difficult moments, and trust that your heart will mend.

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