Quick Answer
There is no definitive rule on whether eyes should be open or closed when kissing or making out. Some experts advise closing your eyes during intimate moments to help you focus on the physical sensations and emotions. Keeping your eyes open can help you read your partner’s nonverbal cues. Ultimately, it comes down to personal preference and what feels natural in the moment.
Making out can be an exciting and pleasurable experience. But it also involves navigating intimate physical contact with another person. Along with questions about technique, hygiene, and consent, you may wonder what to do with your eyes when kissing or making out. Should you keep them open? Closed? Does it matter?
This article will explore the pros and cons of open and closed eyes during intimate moments. We’ll provide tips for figuring out what works best for you and your partner. Read on to learn all about eye contact and etiquette for maximizing satisfaction and comfort when locking lips.
The Case for Closed Eyes
Here are some potential benefits of closing your eyes while kissing or making out:
Heighten Physical Sensations
With your eyes closed, you can focus 100% on the physical sensations you’re experiencing. You won’t be distracted by visual stimuli. This can intensify the feeling of your partner’s lips, face, and body against yours. Allowing your other senses to take over can create a more immersive, connected experience.
Focus on Emotions
Similarly, closing your eyes can allow you to tune into the emotional sensations and meanings associated with kissing this person. You may be able to focus more on the excitement, passion, care, or love behind the act. For many, these emotional components are just as important as the physical ones.
Avoid Self-Consciousness
Making prolonged eye contact can sometimes lead to self-consciousness or performance anxiety. You may overthink things like:
- How do I look right now?
- Is my partner enjoying this?
- Am I a good kisser?
Closing your eyes can block out some of these distracting thoughts. Removing the visual stimuli and partner feedback allows you to live in the moment.
Increase Comfort
For some people, direct eye contact during physical intimacy can feel intimidating or uncomfortable. Keeping eyes closed creates a bit more psychological and emotional safety. This allows them to enjoy the make-out more fully.
The Case for Open Eyes
Here are some potential upsides of keeping your eyes open while kissing:
Read Body Language Cues
With your eyes open, you can pick up on subtle signs from your partner’s body language and facial expressions. Are they leaning in closer or pulling back slightly? Do they seem relaxed and present or somewhat distant? This nonverbal feedback allows you to adjust your movements accordingly.
Create Connection
Eye contact during intimate moments can foster feelings of connection and care. Being able to look into your partner’s eyes while experiencing pleasure together can make the moment feel more special and meaningful. This eye contact helps reinforce your emotional bond.
Heighten Arousal
For some people, eye contact is inherently arousing. Keeping your eyes locked with your partner’s can add intensity and electricity to your make-out session. The eye contact itself becomes a form of foreplay.
Avoid Disorientation
Finally, keeping your eyes open can simply help you avoid feeling dizzy or disoriented during a passionate make-out. If you tend to lose your bearings with eyes closed, visual cues can help anchor the experience.
Tips for Finding the Right Approach
So should you keep your eyes open or closed when kissing? There’s no universally correct answer – it depends on you, your partner, and the situation. Here are some tips for finding the right eye approach:
Pay Attention to Natural Instincts
Notice what feels most natural and comfortable for you in the moment. Do you automatically close your eyes when going in for a first kiss? Or do you prefer to lock eyes? Go with your gut.
Consider Your Partner’s Cues
Pay attention to what your partner does with their eyes. If they seem more comfortable with eyes closed, follow their lead. If they lock eyes with you, sustain the eye contact. Matching your partner’s cues can help you sync up.
Communicate
Don’t hesitate to openly communicate with your partner about preferences. You could say something simple like, “I really like looking into your eyes when we kiss” or “It helps me focus if I close my eyes, is that okay?”
Try Both Approaches
Experiment with both open and closed eyes during the same make-out session. Get a feel for what works best for both of you in different moments. Varying the eye contact can be exciting.
Set the Mood
Consider the environment. Dim mood lighting may naturally lead to more closed eyes, while daylight fosters more eye contact. Let the setting guide your instincts.
Best Practices
Whichever approach you take, keep these tips in mind:
- Go slowly when initiating kisses so your partner isn’t caught off guard.
- Keep your gaze soft and natural, not intense and staring.
- Read body language and nonverbal cues before, during, and after kissing.
- Respect your partner’s preferences and comfort level.
- Don’t overthink it – relax and enjoy the moment!
Follow your intuition, communicate openly, and remain present. With this balanced approach, eye contact during intimacy can be fun, intimate, and pleasurable.
The Pros and Cons of Closed Eyes
Here is a summary of the potential pros and cons of keeping your eyes closed while kissing and making out:
Pros
- Focus on physical sensations
- Tune into emotional experience
- Avoid self-consciousness
- Increase comfort and reduce vulnerability
Cons
- Miss body language cues from partner
- Lose connection of eye contact
- Potentially feel dizzy or disoriented
- Miss the arousal and intimacy of eye contact
The Pros and Cons of Open Eyes
Here are the potential upsides and downsides of keeping your eyes open during intimate contact:
Pros
- Read your partner’s body language
- Foster deeper connection through eye contact
- Increase arousal for some people
- Avoid disorientation
Cons
- Potential for self-consciousness or performance anxiety
- May feel uncomfortable or intimidating for some
- Distraction from physical sensations
- Less ability to tune into emotional experience
How To Decide What’s Best
When deciding whether to keep your eyes open or closed while making out, consider these factors:
Comfort Level
Think about what makes you feel comfortable and relaxed in intimate situations. Do you prefer to see your partner or tune out visuals? There are no wrong answers.
Partner’s Cues
Pay attention to your partner’s natural cues. Do they close their eyes or lock eyes with you? Matching behaviors can help you sync up.
Mood and Setting
The environment can influence instincts. Dim, intimate settings may lend themselves to closed eyes while well-lit spaces may prompt eye contact.
Level of Intimacy
Early kisses may feel more natural with eyes closed while deeper intimacy may involve more eye contact. Let levels of passion and arousal guide your eye engagement.
Communication
Talk to your partner about what eye contact feels right for both of you in different situations. Seek mutual comfort and enjoyment.
Tips for Eye Contact
If you decide open-eyed kissing is right for you, keep these tips in mind:
– Initiate slowly allowing your partner time to reciprocate.
– Keep your gaze soft and natural, not staring intensely.
– Let your eyes communicate affection and interest.
– Take breaks from eye contact as needed.
– Read your partner’s comfort level and adjust accordingly.
– Try angles like looking into one eye, then the other.
– Allow eye contact to evolve naturally rather than forcing it.
With the right energy and attitude, eye contact can elevate intimacy and enjoyment. Have fun exploring!
Conclusion
To keep your eyes open or closed during kissing comes down to personal preference between you and your partner. There are pros and cons to both approaches. Closed eyes can heighten physical sensation, deepen emotional connection, and increase comfort. Open eyes allow you to read body language, foster bonding through eye contact, and avoid disorientation.
Ultimately, follow your instincts in the moment, pay attention to your partner’s signals, and communicate openly. Whether you lock eyes, close your eyes, or mix it up, kissing can be deeply enjoyable and intimate. The most important thing is that you and your partner feel safe and comfortable. Relax, have fun, and savor those special moments of physical closeness.