Knowing when the time is right for that first kiss can be tricky. Both men and women often wonder when the appropriate moment arrives to lean in for a smooch. Some first kisses happen naturally in the heat of a romantic moment, while others require more planning and strategic timing. This guide will explore the signs to look for so you can determine when to make your move for an amazing first kiss.
How to Tell if a Guy Wants You to Kiss Him
Here are some clues that indicate a guy is open and ready for you to initiate a first kiss:
He makes strong eye contact
Prolonged eye contact is one of the clearest signs a man wants you to kiss him. When his eyes lock onto yours, it signals he is very interested and attentive to you. Maintaining solid eye contact for an extended time also creates intimacy and connection. If you notice him frequently gazing into your eyes, there’s a good chance he’s hoping you’ll close the gap between your lips.
He compliments your appearance
Flattering remarks about aspects of your looks – like your eyes, smile, hair or outfit – are often a guy’s way of flirting and showing appreciation. When he comments on details he finds attractive about you, it means he’s focused on your lips and face. Compliments clue you into the fact that he’s drawn to you. After a sincere compliment, he’s likely to be receptive to a kiss.
His body language leans in
Observe the way he positions himself when you are together. Does he tend to lean in close and angle his body towards you? Overall open, interested posture where he is turned towards you, instead of away, is a good sign he wants physical closeness. Leaning in is an instinctual way of showing interest and readiness for more intimacy.
He licks his lips
Licking his lips when you are together is both a sign of physical attraction and anticipation. When his lips are dry, he may naturally lick them to moisten them. But he may also subconsciously lick in preparation for a kiss he’s hoping for. Observe if he engages in this lip-licking frequently in your interactions.
He gets extra touchy
Increased, affectionate touching delivers the message that he’s into you. Hugs, playful touches on your arm, shoulders or knees, tickling, or moving your hair out of your face all demonstrate his interest in physical connection. Reciprocating this light tactile flirting can build anticipation to take things to the next level with a kiss.
Your conversations turn personal
When a guy feels comfortable opening up to you about deeper topics, he’s indicating a level of emotional intimacy. Discussing hopes, dreams, vulnerabilities or meaningful life experiences helps you bond. This trust builds a foundation for the potential physical intimacy of kissing.
How to Initiate a First Kiss
Once you’ve gotten signals he’s open to it, here are tips for making your move:
Pick the right moment
Timing is important for a great first kiss. The ideal time is a private moment when you are having a connected, lighthearted interaction. You want to aim for a quiet pause in conversation, where you are both relaxed yet engaged with each other. Being alone someplace comfortable enhances the intimate vibe.
Make extended eye contact
Gaze into his eyes for a few seconds with a flirtatious smile to generate the desire for kissing. Locking eyes in close proximity is an invitation to get closer. A mutual, lingering stare builds anticipation and sparks the urge to kiss.
Get in close
Inch yourself closer bit by bit as signals progress between you. You want to gradually enter intimate physical proximity to lay the groundwork. Approach to within about a foot or so from his face. Invade his personal space in a flirty way, lingering there comfortably.
Break the touch barrier
Before going for a first kiss, introduce some light touches – like resting your hand on his shoulder, knee or chest. Or gently caress his arm or stroke his hair. Physical contact breaks down barriers and eases you both into increased intimacy. It gets you primed for kissing.
Moisten your lips
Run your tongue along your lips to keep them moist. Avoid applying thick lip balm or gloss that could leave residue. You want your lips to be soft and kissable. He may take this lip preparation as a “green light” signal that you’re aiming to kiss.
Give a parting glance at his lips
Let your gaze drift down to briefly rest on his mouth. This small gesture indicates where you’re headed. It alerts him to your intentions, allowing him time to decide if he consents. Lock eyes again after your lip glance to gauge his reaction.
Go in slowly and read his signals
Begin angling your face toward his, watching for any signs of retreat. Advance about 80% of the distance, then pause and wait for him to show he welcomes your kiss by relaxing his facial muscles and parting his lips slightly. If you don’t detect willingness, pull back and abort the mission! But if he appears eager, close the final 20% to connect your lips.
How to Know if Your First Kiss is Successful
You will likely be able to gauge how well your first kiss lands based on nonverbal cues and how he responds. Signs it goes over well include:
He kisses you back passionately
Of course, the clearest indicator of success is if he reciprocates by kissing you back! If he presses his lips firmly against yours and matches your rhythm, he is fully engaged. Passionate kissing that lasts more than a quick peck signals you have chemistry.
He smiles during or after the kiss
Seeing a smile break out on his face – either mid-kiss or immediately after – means he enjoyed the experience. Smiling indicates happiness, comfort and attraction. It’s a great sign he wanted the kiss and is thrilled it finally happened.
He compliments it afterward
Positive verbal feedback about the kiss itself or your kissing skills is reassurance he was into it. Post-kiss compliments like “You’re an amazing kisser” or “That was nice” clearly express his approval and desire to continue kissing.
He initiates more kissing
If a guy is eager for another kiss shortly after you make the first move, take it as enthusiasm. He may initiate subsequent kisses more passionately than the first. When he re-initiates, it proves he liked what just happened and craves more.
His body appears relaxed
Comfortable, relaxed body language – minus any discernible tension or rigidity – sends the message he’s at ease with greater physical intimacy developing between you. Melting tension in his face, shoulders and limbs is a positive sign.
He caresses your face, neck or hair
Look for affectionate gestures like him touching your face and neck delicately. Tucking your hair behind your ear or stroking your cheek conveys affection. These tender signals act as a barometer for gauging his level of emotional investment.
He asks to see you again soon
When a guy says something like, “I’d really like to see you again,” sets up another date immediately or texts the next day referencing your kiss, it’s safe to say he enjoyed it. Making plans to repeat the experience means he’s craving more.
How to Recover if Rejected
While getting rejected stings, don’t get discouraged if your kiss attempt doesn’t get a reciprocal response. Here are constructive ways to handle possible rejection with grace:
Stay cool and respectful
If he turns his cheek or pulls away, don’t take it personally. Respond calmly without acting hurt or offended. Being mature about his choice shows confidence and character.
Keep it light with humor
Defuse any awkwardness with a bit of light-hearted humor if appropriate, like “My timing really needs work, huh?” Don’t make him feel bad, just breeze past it.
Communicate openly
If you feel comfortable, you can say something polite like “I’m getting mixed signals from you” to acknowledge the disconnect. Or ask if he would prefer to move more slowly. Open discussion gets you clarity.
Suggest hanging out again platonically
Proposing a casual group hangout as friends takes the pressure off. Or say you enjoy talking to him and would like to get together again sometime. Making low-key plans confirms there are no hard feelings.
Examine if you misread cues
Think carefully if you may have perceived signals of interest inaccurately. Learn from the experience so you can fine-tune your radar for next time. Analyze what factors could have led to misreading his behavior.
Focus on self-confidence
Romantic rejection should not impact your self-worth. Avoid negative self-talk and acknowledge that different people have varying comfort levels with physical intimacy. Believe in your desirability regardless of his response.
Consider if timing was off
The setting or his mood may have influenced his reaction. Try to discern if outside circumstances threw him off. Maybe he was preoccupied or the timing just felt awkward to him for some reason.
Conclusion
Kissing someone for the first time can be nerve-wracking, but paying attention to signals from verbal and body language will help you decipher the best moment. When in doubt, look for enthusiastic consent before making your move. With the right partner at the right time, sum up your courage and lean in for that sweet, magical first kiss!
Signs He Wants You to Kiss Him | How to Initiate a First Kiss | Signs of a Successful First Kiss |
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